Afraid? I Think Not.

What a beautiful day it was. I woke up and went on a walk, and then enjoyed a couple of hours at Starbucks; however, after this, the day started to become intersting. I'm currenlty reading this book that talks about the 'Toltec' culture and how they practice thier day-to-day lives. It's faciniating. How as a culure they aren't afraid of life, or let me phrase this better: they arn't afraid of others thoughts towards them. And more importantly, they aren't afraid of themselves. They're true to themselves in a way that they don't lie to themselvs. Any way, what I was getting at is this, I did some four-wheel driving today 'off-road,' and it was a blast. I enjoyed inclining up a hill that was at least a 60 degree angle. And I also went through some mud that was about 200 yards long and a least a foot-and-a half deep. Execept for one time, I went sideways and ran into a tree. You see, the off-road I was driving on is met for four-wheel recreational vehicles and is not very wide. And there are trees everywhere on each side. It's pretty cool. Make a long story, short, I finally ran into a tree. However instead of getting upset -- like I used to do, and think 'why did I ever go here, I should of just stayed home and then I wouldn't have dented my bumber,' -- I embraced it and thought how much fun I just had. I wanted to go back and do it again, showing that mud-spot 'who was boss.' But, my X-terra was spent for the day. Now, I'm stoked to fix the dent in my bumber and the lights that I broke, because knowing that I can fix it, gives me new confidence. It makes me know I can do anything, and I belive I can. I don't need others and I don't care what others think. I went to the Steelers game by myself. Now I know so many people that would feel too self-consious for that, but I don't. I did back in the day, however, my new-self doesn't. I know who I am, and I am confortable with this. I'm not afraid of anything. I'm true to myself. This process has taken me some time. And it will take some time, but I know I can achieve anything.